 Right before chopping off 10 inches! 2013 is the culmination of my 50th year of life. All my over 50 Pixel Pals are nodding their heads saying, "Been there, Done that." Of course, they know I'm only half way through this journey, and can understand my taking stock to see what's coming around the bend.
I, like all others before me, am feeling the clock ticking faster, and am responding with trying to do more by this mid-century mark. So, here is my 05 by 50 list for your reading and laughing pleasure.
- Go Skydiving
- Appreciate my curves enough so that I can walk on a beach in a bathing suit without sucking in my stomach
- Chop off my long hair and donate it (DONE!)
- Finish one of my novels
- Pay my monthly mortgage from writing
I'll keep you posted as time goes by. I have until September 2013 to do these five things!Here's to the next 50 years!What did you do, or will you do by the time you turn 50?Mary Kathryn Johnson
Author ~ Entrepreneur ~ Mom
@SayBumpandTweet
Everything MommyLoves
Say Bump and Take a Left
All that is left! LOVE IT!
 I am lucky enough to have a partner who loves yard work.Unfortunately that wonderful, incredibly patient man is also a Tax Man, and is incognito until April 15, but the weeds don't know that. So, every spring, the boys and I start the yearly clean-up of our yard. It's the least we can do since he works 16 hours a day, 7 days a week. I dread the chore at first, but as I get into a rhythm, it's wonderfully satisfying and cathartic. Am I that messed up that I find writing material amongst the weeds?! After a full day of weeding, my hands represent my future 80 year old self, and my back complains louder than my hands......now on to the laundry with a head cleared of weeds just like the yard.What are your chore comparisons?Mary Kathryn Johnson
Author ~ Entrepreneur ~ Mom
@SayBumpandTweet
Everything MommyLoves
Say Bump and Take a Left
 Hope is wishing you could change your life.Faith is believing you could change your life.Courage is changing your life.The ONLY requirement for change is Courage. All else is pavement of the path to courage.
What in your life do you have the courage to change?Mary Kathryn Johnson
Author ~ Entrepreneur ~ Mom
@SayBumpandTweet
Everything MommyLoves
Say Bump and Take a Left
 Are you getting discouraged with your goal to lose weight or get healthy in 2013, just like every other year? Well, I have a secret that could just be the magic pill!
Ready?This isn't a call to...follow this particular weight loss technique, and you, too, could look like me! If you looked like me, there would be two of us, and you would have to be the evil twin.
Find what is right for YOU!
How? Start by sitting down, taking a deep breath, and shutting up! That includes your thoughts, don't let them shout at you that you should be vacuuming, or fixing dinner, or writing that blogpost, or finding out what your silent toddler is up to...well, that one you better listen to. Go ahead, I'll wait.
When you sit and listen, you just might see where you need to put the most energy to make yourself a better version of yourself.
- Is it what you eat?
- Is it how fast you eat?
- Is it how often you eat?
- Is it your activity level? (or lack thereof)
- Is it your activity frequency? (or lack thereof)
- Is it your triggers to eat, like stress, boredom, TV watching, picking off the kids' plates, tasting while cooking?
- Is it your late night snacking?
- Is it that you DON'T eating breakfast?
I guarantee that if you sit quietly for a few minutes a day, and focus on just one change you want to make in your life, you will start acting toward that change. It takes 21 days of daily focus to change a habit. We have passed that date in the New Year, and will pass it again next month, and next year.
You might as well focus now for long term change, because no "diet" will help you maintain a healthy lifestyle once you lose weight. Only your daily focus will do that.
If, after listening quietly, you find that you are just fine the way you are, then Fantastic! I bet you have more to learn in life, because you are human, by the way, and that means decidedly not perfect. There must be something you need to do to improve upon that amazing package? Internal and external change have their roots in your mind and attitude every time.
So sit and listen at least once a day. Call it whatever you want...taking a breath...me time...meditation...finding your smile...calming down so you don't spew at someone...whatever! We all need a moment, and if that moment moves us forward toward our goals, THAT'S THE POINT!
Mary Kathryn Johnson
Author ~ Entrepreneur ~ Mom
@SayBumpandTweet
MommyLoves to Chat!
Everything MommyLoves
Say Bump and Take a Left
I have learned quite a few things this year, and have learned to actually live many more that I already knew. Here goes...
- Say "Yes" and allow your children to be children as often as possible, unless what they want will harm them or someone else. Sometimes saying "No" becomes a habit we need to break.
- Children and adults are moved by and respond to compassionate reasoning over yelling every time, and can see in your eyes if your faking.
- Those who don't respond right away, probably expect and are more familiar with the yelling, so they need the compassion even more.
- Show those you love that they are loved whenever the opportunity arises, not because that might be your last chance to do so, but because you actually love them.
- People actually get the opposite of what they want when they don't make their own educated decisions, and instead, follow blindly whatever group will lead them.
- Those older than you almost always have a wisdom worth listening to if you just close your mouth and open your heart.
- "Normal" people are just not eccentric enough to imagine and create the advancements the world has enjoyed. Thank goodness enough of those "eccentric" people have not been drugged normal yet so we can continue advancing as a civilization.
- It's almost always NOT about you.
- When it is about you, say and show you are sorry.
- The focus of your daily attention is your current reality and the foundation of your future.
- That future becomes your new reality much faster than you expect.
- The focus of your daily attention is also your child's current reality, and becomes the foundation for the future reality of your grandchildren.
- Making a child smile brings more light and warmth to life than anything else.
- It is our choices, not our talents that show who we truly are. (Okay, I stole that one from Dumbledore, but it bears repeating daily!)
- Having someone in your life who has been present throughout most of your history, and still likes you is an amazing gift.
- Tomorrow is another day with no mistakes in it. (Okay, I stole that one from Miss Stacy, but I still have to go to sleep repeating it.)
I would greatly appreciate any other wisdom you can share as we say good bye to one year, and my learning continues in another.Mary Kathryn Johnson
Author ~ Entrepreneur ~ Mom
@SayBumpandTweet
MommyLoves to Chat!
Everything MommyLoves
Say Bump and Take a Left
 Life-changing milestones just around the corner are making me more mindful of the time I have in front of me. The hourglass is running out, and if I live to 100, I'm half way there. Yes, I'm in my 50th year on this planet...if I lived on any others, I don't remember.
I also have a child just starting high school. Talk about a milestone...letting go. I feel very strongly the lyrical meaning of "If You Love Somebody Set Them Free" by Sting. I am preparing to set him free, and it's scary and exciting all at the same time...just like when gave birth to him.
I now understand I must be more mindful of my actions, not just in parenting, but in everything I do.
I am one of those types who can get sucked into the black hole of links imbedded in everything I read online, so my day could easily pass by me faster than a toddler escaping his mother. Consequently, online is the one area I must fight to stay mindful every minute. To this end, I have started putting every little thing I need to accomplish each day on my calendar, and I adhere to my "social media posting/reading" time slot more strictly than any other. Because there are several wonderful writers whose posts I visit and comment often, I will need to make time to seek out, and read new writers weekly in order to expand my mental horizons with new information and opinions. I now know why posts and books are getting shorter and shorter - supply is following demand. I also use HootSuite to schedule regular postings to both Facebook and Twitter, and keep them scheduled at least 5 days in advance.
My mindfulness is also being applied to my writing. I have always been a "project" person - I get ideas, and if I don't write them down or record them on my iPhone while driving, they are lost forever...or until I happen to experience the same impetus to think of them again. This more than anything else has allowed me to get more writing done in a shorter amount of time! Since I am sort of a procrastinator...okay a lot of...even though I love to write, it is much easier to read. I can use a deadline as an excuses to lollygag all day, and power through my work at the last minute. With my new mindfulness that life is running out, I only allow myself this laziness occasionally, rather than weekly.
Back to my 14 year old...I only have 1460 days until he goes to college. Actually, I only have 12,030 HOURS of my son's time over the next four years until I let him loose on the world to make his own mark. (Yes, I'm also showing my OCD in having calculated this number four years in advance, considering extra time for weekends and holidays and only 6 hours during the school days, but if I'm confessing my procrastination, I might as well go all the way.) This number really made me sit up and say, "What?!" like I did when I heard Bill say what he did with Monica was not considered sex. I must have heard that wrong, I'm sorry, calculated that wrong...I don't understand...How could I only have mere hours left for my son to wake up every day to a breakfast I make, and go to sleep every night to my "L'amo"...? What about my youngest? He's turning 11 next month, and middle school goes by in a blink!
Hence, my mindfulness in everything I do. I won't overreact to this realization that I'm like Wile E. Coyote chasing after my Road Runner of a life. I won't wait outside the bathroom door while my oldest is inside taking a shower just to say, "I Love You" when he comes out - he told me that was creepy. I won't write for hours on end because I have so much to say, and so little time - my weak bladder muscles won't allow that.
I will simply be mindful of my thoughts and actions, and exercise my power of choice. I don't have time or energy to waste on petty thoughts, conversations and deeds. Life and love are too beautiful to cast a shadow on the world through my heedless actions.How do you keep yourself mindful of all you want to accomplish and enjoy each day? Mary Kathryn Johnson
Author ~ Entrepreneur ~ Mom
@SayBumpandTweet
MommyLoves to Chat!
Everything MommyLoves
Say Bump and Take a Left
 Yes, I am addicted, and here is my supplier. He stays late for me to get my fix, because he knows I'm hooked. He offers me new blends of my drug, and I salivate at the mere mention.
Okay...sorry Dennis, I just had to be dramatic, you know me! Really, this is the best coffee I have ever tasted, hand roasted weekly by the nicest family. Dennis and Renee Planje have both been amazingly wonderful and accommodating to my addiction, and I have corrupted several of my own family members to become hooked on their Moka Java Roast - it has very soothing chocolate tones.
Four months ago, I found El Dorado Coffee & Tea Co. through an internet search after being completely underwhelmed by the grocery store coffee selection, and the unpredictable delivery of roasters as close as San Francisco and as far away as Italy. I personally visit Dennis every other week to get my 2lb. vacuum sealed bag of Moka Java - sometimes I buy two 2lb. bags when my father-in-law visits. I can run out of milk, bread or cereal, but NEVER coffee beans. Yes, I get whole beans...I even invested in a built in Miele coffee maker when we remodeled our kitchen three years ago, and this grind-and-brew one cup at a time appliance is still the most used. The true extent of my addiction is that my kids know how to turn on the coffee maker, and make me a cappuccino. In true Italian fashion, my youngest has a mocha once a week with half a shot. He loves coffee!
He's almost 11, okay?! Geez! It's not like I'm stunting his growth or anything! (I'm not, right?!)
El Dorado Coffee & Tea Co. delivers, you know, so I highly suggest you try their coffee. If you are not as addicted as I am, and you need ground coffee, they can do that. Just let them know what type of grind - French Press, Drip, etc. - and they will do all the hard work, all you need do is put it in your coffee maker! Tell them Mary sent you...not that it will get you any special treatment, because they treat everyone like family, but just 'cause it makes me feel good. ;-)If you need another reason to shop at El Dorado Coffe & Tea Co. besides the quality products and great people, here you go: Renee co-founded Project2Love, an organization in partnership with the International Women's Coffee Alliance (IWCA) that helps create a channel for distributing women owned and grown coffee and tea products. Supporting these small farms allows their women owners to earn a living and feed their families. So, buy this coffee, and it will taste good and make you feel good at the same time (and I'm not just talking about the high of feeding your addiction, you'll also be feeding families).
Okay, I must confess that my motive in posting this is to spread my addiction far and wide. Addicts never want to get high alone, right?! But, seriously, if you like coffee, you will love this coffee...and you will never go back to Starbucks!
Just sayin' ~
UPDATE: Just so you know, I am not compensated in any way by El Dorado Coffee & Tea, and I buy my coffee from them with my own money. I will expect them to give away their wonderful product when Obama or any other President gives me a break!
Mary Kathryn Johnson
Author ~ Entrepreneur ~ Mom
@SayBumpandTweet
MommyLoves to Chat!
Everything MommyLoves
Say Bump and Take a Left
 10. It's Fun!
9. You create something, even though it looks like an alien mass of Legos.
8. It gives you time away from your husband and his belching as long as you are doing it in a room with no TV.
7. You don't have to cook or clean anything.
6. You don't have to pay a babysitter almost more than the Psychologist.
5. You bond with your kids in their world.
4. You don't have to fill up the car with gas to get there.
3. Following those 30 page manuals takes total concentration, and if crying is therapy, you will get more than you need.
2. Working with your hands to build something is like meditation, and you can do it while lying down on the couch in your own home.
1. Using your imagination takes you out of your own head, which is really where the problem started!
Now, since you probably bought some of those Legos as a Christmas or Hanukkah present, you have a perfect excuse to de-stress from the daily hassle without spending any extra money. For goodness sake, if you still feel you need therapy, send me the money, and we can schedule weekly chats that are sure to make you laugh and cry...Oh, that's number zero...Some of the lego creations your kids can create will surely make you laugh! (consider that one a free gift)
(disclaimer ~ The author in no way claims to be a Psychologist or any other kind of therapist, unless you are directly related to the author. In that case she is completely qualified to talk you through any childhood trauma you wish to discuss, as she is a licensed Johnson family therapist.)Mary Kathryn Johnson
Author ~ Entrepreneur ~ MomSay Bump and Take a Left
@SayBumpandTweet
Everything MommyLoves
Your Story on Your Terms
 I love to run. My habit is to run with my two Aussies in the early morning when all but the few desperate commuters and farmers are asleep. I meet my running acquaintances along my usual route, and we simply nod, finger wave or smile as we are committed to our chosen focus method...listening to our own rhythm or the one in our ears. We have never met, but miss each other when we miss a run. As with habits, sometimes it's necessary to break them, just for a bit. Last night at twilight I finally was able to go for a 2 mile run. It's interesting that twilight is very similar to dawn, two sides of the same day. The pups were a bit skittish with the strange sounds of the waning, rather than waxing of the day, when we came upon a fellow runner we had never met.
This gentleman - I call him that because I call all men of my father's age gentlemen even though my father has earned the opposite title, while I can't help but give the benefit of the doubt to others - was coming down a hill toward us. As we approached each other, he grimaced and fell spectacularly, head over heels. As I reined in the pups, I turned off my music and asked, "Are you okay?" Not a bright question with the road rash becoming brighter by the second, but an automatic one nonetheless. "I have my phone, and can call someone to drive you home if you need."
He snickered, and said as he started to stand, "I'm fine. This is my penance for ignoring the cramp in my calf." He gingerly put weight on the cramped leg, and began to stumble, but continued on, trying to regain his gait.
I called after him, "You sure you don't want me to get you a ride home, you could do some permanent damage."
Barely turning, his voice trailing off, he said, "I've had worse...besides, it might cripple me temporarily, but it won't kill me." Chuckling, he added, "Now, Death, that will be the ultimate run."
I stood watching the colors of the sunset and his retreating, ever fainter figure. "Damn straight," I said to my panting, impatient dogs, restarting the rhythm in my ears as I faced the oncoming hill. Switching my playlist to "Soul Sister" by Train, I double-timed it up the hill and added an extra mile.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
When faced with the possibility of a stumble of any kind, I will always remember that it is just that - every difficulty is just a stumble. I might get scraped up a bit...hell I hit a bump and broke both my legs while I had my second 8 month pregnant bump in my baby hotel (hence, my drawing for the picture to this post). If I can survive that with my sense of humor in tact, and learn some amazing lessons about life, my relationships and myself...I can do anything!
When you stumble, don't stay down, double-time it up that hill - death is waiting to run with you!
Yes, Death will be the Ultimate Run, don't you think?
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